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Monday, March 14, 2011

Tales From The Sh!t Keeper

You know what pisses me off? You can get home take the BIGGEST sh!t of your life and use a whole roll of toilet paper, FLUSH the frigg'n toilet and the Sh!T goes down. But say your somewhere else lets say a friends house & your like "OMG I don't want to take a Sh!t here but I got to cause I got a turtle head poking out" So you go to the bathroom and of course it the stinkiest grossest Sh!t you have ever taken in your life. Your smelling up the whole bathroom. So you Flush and what happens THE FUGG'N TOILET CLOGS now panic sets in "Please don't breach the bowl, Please" The first thing you think is "Where is the Plunger?" You start looking beside the toilet if it's not there then your on a tiny mission to hide your poop disaster. You start looking behind the door, under the sink and you Find it and your heart slows down just a bit cause your not sure it this is the fix for your problem just yet. You start the plunging process and Success it goes down. I advise everyone Sh!t before you leave the house because there is going to be that one time where there is NO plunger in sight and then what are you going to do? I once was at this seedy hotel with family and went to use the CRAPPER and the Toilet Clogged and there was no plunger. I had to tell everyone that was there that I plugged the toilet and I had to call the front desk twice to ask them to send one to are room, They never brought one I had to then walk to the front desk and ask for one. Now that's Embarrassing. Word to the wise don't use public toilets to poop cause it uber gross when your doing the deed and some one comes in and uses the stall beside you to drop a load of there own brown babys & you never know he might plug the toilet and you will end up with poop water on your new sneakers.


  1. Remind me to never let you shit at my place!

  2. this is what you need in that case